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Paul Martin put through x-ray scanner while asking for respect from George W. Bush By: Malcolm Mayes 2004-01-13	Airline passenger urinates out airline window By: Malcolm Mayes 2004-01-12	Crocodile Hunter Bush endangers homeland security baby By: Jake Fuller 2004-01-08	Air marshall accompanies Rover to Mars By: Glenn Foden 2004-01-07
Statue of Liberty asks for fingerprints and mug shots By: Jonathan Brown 2004-01-07	U.S. Customs begins taking fingerprints and photos By: M.e. Cohen 2004-01-06	U.S. sky marshals are armed with crying babies By: Jake Fuller 2003-12-31	Orange alert placed in American Christmas stocking By: Jonathan Brown 2003-12-24
Santa is stopped and searched by U.S. Homeland Security By: Ed Hall 2003-12-23	Santa is scared to fly during Orange Alert By: Michael de Adder 2003-12-23	Osama bin Laden hopes for red alert level for Christmas By: M.e. Cohen 2003-12-22	Homeland defense accidentally shoots down Santa's sleigh By: Glenn Foden 2003-12-15
John Ashcroft searches under Statue of Liberty's skirt By: Robt Snyder 2003-12-10	Uncle Sam lights Canadian passport on fire By: Bob Krieger 2003-12-09	Santa Bush shoves large spending down narrow budget chimney By: Glenn Foden 2003-12-03	Homeland security goes too far when American buys book By: Harley Schwadron 2003-11-28
Financially stretched airline adopts anti-missile security By: Roy Peterson 2003-08-18	Americans ask Homeland Security if duct tape is SARS proof By: Edward Smith 2003-05-06	Fearful American sealed in plastic and duct tape By: Ed Hall 2003-03-12	George W. Bush dimisses FBI agent Coleen Rowley's concerns about Iraq war By: Kirk Anderson 2003-03-10
American alarmed when Horsemen of Apocalyse show up By: Edward Smith 2003-03-07	Dept. of Homeland Security is full of bureaucracy By: Edward Smith 2003-02-20	George Bush's Homeland Security monster is alive By: Ed Hall 2003-02-12	Homeland Insecurity Advisory indicates nation is terrified By: Jonathan Brown 2003-02-12

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